le_s__ @^ _F 100 lessons

"Do what contributes to making you more genuine, moves you closer to yourself."

Pascal Mercier Night Train to Lisbon

Interesting implication there--that we are not ourselves, that we are somehow separated from outselves, and that in order to live a genuine life we mut find our way to our selves.  This seems true to me--and certainly explains the great need for mental health counselors.  The question is, then, what accounts for this separation from the self?  It's possible that it's a condition that the human being is born into, but I don't think that's it.  Young children seem very much to be themselves, and thus are genuine, and thus their observations of the world are often charming or even startling.  So the separation comes at a later date.  The events depicted in the novel suggest that the separation is caused by relationships with significant others--especially parents & loved ones, but also teachers, religious leaders, even casual acquaintances.  It also suggests--and I see this as right in line with what William James had to say in "The Social Me"--that it is by entering into relationships with others that we fracture ourselves, compromise ourselves . . . begin the process of separating ourselves from ourselves.  In order to remain whole (& genuine), then, it seems that one would have to have little to do with the world outside of he self.  But certainly we can't believe that the path to the genuine life is only opened by separating one's self from the world.  Well, unless you're a Buddhist.  For the most part, though, it seems pretty obvious that one of the purposed for existence is to encounter others . . . and, hopefully, to help or learn or appreciate when possible.  

Can one enter into relationships with others without compromise, without obsequiousness, without surrender?  Good question.  Is it even proper to do so?  Another good question.

But it's not an all or nothing proposition.  One can be honest in a relationship if one is strong enough, brave enough, to do so.  (It takes a pretty special person to put up with that kind of shit, though.)  But one can also do the necessary small compromises that make getting through the day without resort to firearms possible.

But enough.  I want to read some more.