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Archie 1941 on Comixology

Speaking of comic books...I am thinking about doing a comic book only blog. Wondering if a more focused thing might not be a good way to get past this whole I suck and I don't have anything to say, and besides I'll be dead soon so why bother thing that has been paralyzing my pickers and stealers. And I do buy comic books pretty much every week--and have for the past 55 years or so--so there'd be no lack of things to write about. And I'd enjoy it. And it might even be useful. Like, "Hey, don't buy that Black Label Superman #1, it's shit!" could save somebody eight bucks. So...maybe. 

For now, here's a few thoughts on Archie 1941. 

Which I haven't yet read.

But that's not the point this time around.

First off, though, a disclaimer: I love Comixology. And I love Amazon. I kind of wish that Amazon didn't own Comixology, because I think we buyers might benefit if there was some competition there, but that's the way it is on this bitch of an earth.

When I saw the first issue of Archie 1941 on the stands, I really wanted it. I loved the concept, the cover art looked cool, and hey, I like Archie. (Though I'm not very fond of the CW show, I have to admit. But Veronica and Betty and Cheryl are pretty hot, so I don't mind watching it with Joe.) But it was $3.99 an issue, and I figured that it would be in a trade paperback before long, and that would actually be cheaper than the individual issues, and it would include all of the variant covers, too, so...I decided to wait.

And then I kind of forgot about it. But yesterday I saw the trade paperback on the stands at The Great Escape, and I picked it up and looked at the price tag...$17.99. A little cheaper than the single issues would have been, but not much. Of course, TGE does give a 25% discount on trades, so that would have cut it down to a very reasonable $13.49 (+ tax)...but then I thought, "Comixology will do a lot better than that, though, won't they?" And I put the book back on the shelf and resolved to check it out when I got home.

And, for once, I actually remembered to do some checking out when I got back home.

And I was happy (and not surprised to see) this:

I mean...SERiously. That's less than the price of two individual issues. And I was ready to click the buy button when I thought, "I wonder what the individual issues are going for?" And I looked. And saw this:

Mmm-hmm. That's $4.95 for the series. As in cheaper than two print issues. Of course, it's possible that the variant covers won't be part of the deal...but shit, man, that's one hell of a deal.

And it seemed a bit of a cheat, y'know? I mean...you've got to watch these fuckers EVERY SECOND.

And with that in mind, I thought I'd better check Amazon, because I've found that there is sometimes a big difference there, as well. And I saw this:

Are you seeing what I'm seeing? Why the hell is this book $14.99 via Kindle and $7.99 on Comixology and $4.95 on Comixology in individual issues? 

Our survey says...because if you don't want to be fucked, you've really got to check out all of the options. There are times when the e-collection is much cheaper than the individual e-issues. Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera as you do the other permutations.

In this case, though, you know what to do.

And now I'm going to go do it. So that will be something else to write about, won't it?

News as it happens.



AS IT HAPPENS

I started reading the first issue of Archie 1941, intending to just do that today...but I got caught up in it almost immediately, and ended up reading all five issues straight through with just one interruption to prepare dinner for three and do the dishes for six (breakfast included, see). And? Well, obviously it was good, or I wouldn't have knocked off the whole thing in one fell swoop. But it was more than that, too. It was good. Compelling story. Interesting variations on the characters you already know and love. And the art was really excellent. Not flashy, but evocative of the era, and with some really nice touches. Car headlights, for instance. Yeah, this was a great package. Get it while you can at the low low price mentioned above.

And btw, all the variant covers are shown. They're packed onto one page, but that doesn't really matter in the e-comics world, does it? They have plenty of definition, and you can blow them up to full page size without the slightest sister Kate shimmy.

This story made me remember how good the Archie Marries Betty / Archie Marries Veronica series was a few years back. These characters really lend themselves to reconfiguration. And that, in turn, allows the writers and artists to take some chances they'd never be allowed to take in a "regular" series. In fact, even if you have zero interest in Archie, or, for that matter, zero interest in comic books, I think you would enjoy this series mightily if you gave it a try. Betcha five bucks you would--with a money back guarantee thrown in for good measure.

Label...Black Label

I heard about Batman: Damned and the new Black Label brand in time to pick up that now notorious ("Bat Dick") issue...but I passed on it. Just a moment ago, I found a copy on the Mile High Comics website selling for $220. Keep in mind that that book only came out a few months ago (September 19, 2018) and sold for $6.99 brand new. Well, shit.

That's a hell of a boom, ennit?

So, yes, when I saw Superman: Year One on the stands at The Great Escape today, part of my interest was just plain investment strategy. I mean...lightning probably wouldn't strike twice...and it was pretty unlikely that Super Dick would be on view given the fallout from BD...but, y'know...who knows?

Besides, it was written by Frank Miller, and he has certainly done some fantastic work in the past. Way in the past. Like decades ago.

And the art was by John Romita, Jr., and who can honestly say that they don't like JRjr? 

And even though the price was a hefty $7.99...there was that nice The Great Escape 15% discount.

And it was 64 story pages long...and no ads. Shit, a regular comic is $3.99 for 22 pages, so $7.99 for 64 pages is actually pretty good.

And it's a BIG book...like 9 x 6 x 0.2 inches (quoth The Amazon...I was too busy to measure it myself).

And I managed to lay hands on the last Frank Miller variant cover on the shelves.

So I bought it.

Started reading it.

Um...how shall I say this?

It's just shit, man. For one thing, it's not Superman Year One at all. It's Clark Kent years 1 through 18. Because we've never been there before, have we? There's a bit of a surprise at the end--we don't do spoilers here--but it's a stupid, improbable, and did I mention stupid "innovation."

But that's not what really rubbed me the wrong way. I'm used to comic books being stupid, so stupid is still pretty average. What made this comic book completely worthless (spiritually and intellectually...I'm still holding out some hope for financial viability) was the stupidity in details of the story-telling. After reading this story, I would have to conclude that Frank Miller never attended a public school (every kid in class gets a mock-up astronaut helmet? lunch is 45 minutes long?), knew nothing about the military (again, no spoilers, but let's just say, "The bus! The bus!"), and had probably never been a young boy (too many incidents to pick one out). I mean...for fuck's sake, man. No character in this comic book acts anything like a real human being. And I guess that sounds silly in a way...but in my mind, the more fantastic the story, the more necessary it is to ground it in the real world. I wish Frank had read Maximortal before he sat down to write this piece of shit. (Speaking of, is Rick Veitch getting any credit or money from Brightburn? Cuz some lawsuits are worth pursuing, y'know?)

ANYway...save your money. Unless this thing shoots up 3,000% in value or something like that...in which case...shit, you really should have rolled the dice on this one. Sorry about that, chief.

Things to do this summer...aka Jimmy Kalb Live!

If you find yourself in upper New York and / or Vermont this summer, here's where to go: 

(Buckle, Farmers)

I ❤️ farmers. For several reasons: 

- My Dad longed to live on a farm before he died. (And bought one and was going up on weekends to get it ready when he died, just short of fulfilling his dream.) 

- There are people I love who are full-time farmers. 

- Wendell Berry is a farmer. 

- And besides all of that, I like to eat something other than dead animals.

So when I read Henry Thomas Buckle's comments on farmers ("agriculturists"), I was taken aback. After praising the expansive minds of Merchants, Buckle has this to say about the farmer:

"His views are confined to one country, and often to one place in that country. What he gains in intensity he loses in grasp. His interests, his views, his very aspirations are small and cramped; and, unless he be a man of considerable natural power, he dwindles away in point of intellect to a gaping rustic who cultivates his soil. Now look at history. In every struggle for freedom, in every struggle for onward progress, the merchants and the inhabitants of towns have thrown themselves into the breach, and often have led the forlorn hope. But the agriculturists, the inhabitants of the country, always have been and still are in the rear of their age. Their voices have always been lifted against improvement; and they have but too often succeeded in drowning by clamour what they never could hope to convince by reason. Thus, too, a nation of agriculturists is more liable to superstition than a nation of traders or manufacturers. The farmer is very dependent on nature. A single unfavourable season will baffle the most scientific calculations that he can make. Hence, we find that they resort to astrology, &c. But the manufacturer is not so much operated on by the whims of nature. Whether it is wet or dry, whether it is cold or warm, little matters to the success of his operations. He learns to rely on himself. He puts his faith in his own skill and in his own right arm; nor is he very anxious about the prognostication of the astrologer, or the prayer of the priest . Besides this, in manufactures the inventive powers are infinitely more used than in agriculture. A very obvious consideration will explain the cause of this. In agriculture the principal, I may say the sole expense, is that incurred by producing the raw material, the corn; but in manufacture, the price of the raw material is generally much less than the value of the labour by which that raw material is worked up. Now, it is a well-known law, that the produce of land increases in a diminishing ratio to the quantity of labour employed. But, to the productiveness of manufacturing labour a precisely opposite law is applicable. The consequence is that manufactures are much more susceptible of mechanical improvement than agriculture, and therefore to them mechanical improvements are oftener applied."

Ouch.

But...

Well, it reminded me of Alexis de Tocqueville's comments about the man working on the assembly line, who, because he is forced to focus his attention on making heads for pins for almost one half of his waking life, shrinks in intellectual capacity.

And I had to think about some of the people one of my farmer friends has told me about...how narrow-minded they are...how much they support Trump...without questioning his bullshit. 

So I don't know. How about you? Any thoughts?

Ezekiel 37

Just read this Old Testament story to my daughter: 


Ezekiel 37 King James Version 

37 The hand of the Lord was upon me, and carried me out in the spirit of the Lord, and set me down in the midst of the valley which was full of bones,

2 And caused me to pass by them round about: and, behold, there were very many in the open valley; and, lo, they were very dry.

3 And he said unto me, Son of man, can these bones live? And I answered, O Lord God, thou knowest.

4 Again he said unto me, Prophesy upon these bones, and say unto them, O ye dry bones, hear the word of the Lord.

5 Thus saith the Lord God unto these bones; Behold, I will cause breath to enter into you, and ye shall live:

6 And I will lay sinews upon you, and will bring up flesh upon you, and cover you with skin, and put breath in you, and ye shall live; and ye shall know that I am the Lord.

7 So I prophesied as I was commanded: and as I prophesied, there was a noise, and behold a shaking, and the bones came together, bone to his bone.

8 And when I beheld, lo, the sinews and the flesh came up upon them, and the skin covered them above: but there was no breath in them.

9 Then said he unto me, Prophesy unto the wind, prophesy, son of man, and say to the wind, Thus saith the Lord God; Come from the four winds, O breath, and breathe upon these slain, that they may live.

10 So I prophesied as he commanded me, and the breath came into them, and they lived, and stood up upon their feet, an exceeding great army.

Holy shit! I've read the whole Bible through twice...and I don't remember this one. Kind of witchcraft-y, isn't it? 

Shaft...or...More Autism Humor

Just in case...here are the pertinent lyrics to the Shaft theme song: 

"Who is the man that would risk his neck for his brother, man? (Shaft)

Who's the cat that won't cop out when there's danger all about? 

(Shaft)

They say this cat Shaft is a bad mother--

(Shut your mouth)."

"Theme from Shaft" by Isaac Hayes

Okay? Okay.

Joe and I went to see Shaft today. (No spoilers  but let me just say, "Redbox.") As we were walking in, I asked him if he knew the words to the theme song. He said he did, so I sang, "Who is the man who would risk his neck for his brother man?" and looked at him. 

He said, "Shaft." (No exclamation mark.) 

I sang, Who's the cat who won't cop out when there's danger all about?" 

Joe replied, "Shaft." 

I said, "I hear that cat Shaft is a bad mother--" 

Joe said, "Fucker."

Funniest thing since Jacqueline's "Underwear on a stick!" I didn't even know he knew that word!

姜峯楠 Talks (Again)

I loved Arrival. And that love led me to read Ted Chiang's first book of short stories, Stories of Your Life and Others (2002), and then to seek out all of the other short stories he had published to date. Which didn't take long...there were only seven of them as of 2015. 

And then I waited.

It took awhile...2.67 years or so...but finally I heard that he had a new book coming out. I was pretty excited. But I did the responsible thing and put in a request for it via the free public library. Got on before the book had even been released, so I was pretty high on the list from the get-go, and I'm 2 of 3 even as we speak. (Waitaminute...there are only 3 people waiting for this book in all of Louisville? What the fuck?)

But even that wasn't good enough, so I've been checking out the shelves of Barnes & Noble whenever I went in. And today I found a copy of Exhalation on the shelves. I immediately flipped to the copyright page to see what I could see. And...hmmm. I knew a couple of the titles from my post-first book collection readings. And some of the others seemed familiar, too. I flipped to the last section of the book wherein Chiang had written some comments on the stories, and as I read I realized that I had read almost ALL of these stories. In fact of

 ,

only the last two stories were new to me. Which is not nothing. I mean, they're pretty long...33 + 71 = 104 pages is nothing to sneeze at...but I have to admit that I was kind of glad that I hadn't bought it. I mean, I do love Ted, but $17.07 / $13.99 (Amazon's Print / Kindle prices) is pretty steep for 104 pages.

So.

I'm still looking forward to reading those two stories, for sure. And I'll probably re-read the other stories, too, since it has been awhile, and I do remember liking most of them quite a bit. But I didn't sit there in Barnes & Noble to read them. I think I can wait until the library book comes through.

Sigh.

George III-ish

 "A new courage was infused into those creeping things which the corruption of the state is sure to nourish into life."

Don't worry--its not written about The United States of America 2019. It's Henry Thomas Buckle writing about King George III

Understudy For Death by Charles Willeford

In 2016, I happened upon an omnibus of novels by Charles Willeford, thought the title of the last entry looked interesting, bought it, read aforementioned last entry, liked it, read the other three novels in he omnibus, liked them, and was off and running. 

In fact, of the 100 books I read in 2016, 20 of them * were Willeford books. And I had to quit there, because even though there were six more books published, none of them were available for less than $100 a pop. But in July 2018, HARD CASE CRIME published one of those six: Understudy For Death. (I even had a little something to do with that, which you can read about HERE.) But I didn't buy it when it came out. For one thing, I was off on other author binges. For another thing, the last Willeford books I'd read had been pretty bad. And for a third thing, I'd had an interaction (via this blog) with one of Willeford's people that seemed unnecessarily mean on her part, so I was just kind of over the whole thing. 

But I recently saw that the Louisville Free Public Library had a copy of Understudy For Death, so I decided to have a look. As often happens, I'm sorry to say, after I checked it out it sat around the house for almost three weeks without me opening it. But Louisville must have another Willeford fan, because when I went to renew it, I saw that I could not do so--because someone else had requested it. So with two days before it was due, I bore down on it. Read about fifty pages the day before it was due, and about one hundred and fifty on Due Day. 

It wasn't easy, though.

Because...and I do hate to say this...Understudy For Death was a wretched novel. I fully understand why it was out of print for 60 years. I don't understand why HARD CASE CRIME brought it back to life. If you love Charles Willeford...and I most certainly do...then you don't want to read this book. It is very poorly written, for one thing. It is ostensibly "about" a newspaperman who is kind of sort of investigating a murder / suicide...but at no point is this "investigation" believable. In addition, that newspaperman, who is the main character, is an absolute asshole. He (1) rapes his wife when she doesn't want to have sex with him, (2) cheats on his wife, (3) bosses his wife around as if she is his slave, (4) gets angry when his wife takes a part in a local play and writes a review of the play in which he derides her performance as "adequate"...even though he and everyone else knows that she was really good, and (5) ignores and / or abuses his son. He also just makes dick moves, such as smoking a cigarette in church, barging into a doctor's office (and then lighting up there as well). And if that's not bad enough, there's also a scene wherein another character refers to one of his employees as a "nigger" and then proceeds to fire said employee because he asks if the employer provides a pension plan. (How DARE he.)

And beyond the offensiveness, the thing is just so ineptly written. As just one for instance, the investigation? Never goes anywhere. You never find out why the woman killed her kids and herself. 

If you're a Willeford fan, this book will damage your love for him. If you've never read Willeford before and start with this one, you'll never read another.

In fact, with 5 unread Willefords left to me, I'm thinking that it'd be best to just avoid those titles if they ever see the light of day. I want to keep my love and respect for his writing intact, and I don't know if I can take another hit like this one. Like the bird said, "Leave well enough alone." Right?

Right.

*         61. The Machine in Ward Eleven

62. The Woman Chaser

63. Cockfighter

64. The Burnt Orange Heresy 

67. The Second Half of the Double Feature 

69. High Priest of California

70. Wild Wives

71. Pick-Up 

72. The Black Mass of Brother Springer 

73. Writing and Other Blood Sports (includes New Forms of Ugly: The Immobilized Hero in Modern Fiction)

74. Whip Hand 

75. Sideswipe

77. Miami Blues

78. New Hope for the Dead

79. The Way We Die Now

80. The Shark-Infested Custard

81. I Was Looking for a Street

82. Something About a Soldier

84. The Difference

85. Made in Miami by Charles Willeford