Label...Black Label

I heard about Batman: Damned and the new Black Label brand in time to pick up that now notorious ("Bat Dick") issue...but I passed on it. Just a moment ago, I found a copy on the Mile High Comics website selling for $220. Keep in mind that that book only came out a few months ago (September 19, 2018) and sold for $6.99 brand new. Well, shit.

That's a hell of a boom, ennit?

So, yes, when I saw Superman: Year One on the stands at The Great Escape today, part of my interest was just plain investment strategy. I mean...lightning probably wouldn't strike twice...and it was pretty unlikely that Super Dick would be on view given the fallout from BD...but, y'know...who knows?

Besides, it was written by Frank Miller, and he has certainly done some fantastic work in the past. Way in the past. Like decades ago.

And the art was by John Romita, Jr., and who can honestly say that they don't like JRjr? 

And even though the price was a hefty $7.99...there was that nice The Great Escape 15% discount.

And it was 64 story pages long...and no ads. Shit, a regular comic is $3.99 for 22 pages, so $7.99 for 64 pages is actually pretty good.

And it's a BIG book...like 9 x 6 x 0.2 inches (quoth The Amazon...I was too busy to measure it myself).

And I managed to lay hands on the last Frank Miller variant cover on the shelves.

So I bought it.

Started reading it.

Um...how shall I say this?

It's just shit, man. For one thing, it's not Superman Year One at all. It's Clark Kent years 1 through 18. Because we've never been there before, have we? There's a bit of a surprise at the end--we don't do spoilers here--but it's a stupid, improbable, and did I mention stupid "innovation."

But that's not what really rubbed me the wrong way. I'm used to comic books being stupid, so stupid is still pretty average. What made this comic book completely worthless (spiritually and intellectually...I'm still holding out some hope for financial viability) was the stupidity in details of the story-telling. After reading this story, I would have to conclude that Frank Miller never attended a public school (every kid in class gets a mock-up astronaut helmet? lunch is 45 minutes long?), knew nothing about the military (again, no spoilers, but let's just say, "The bus! The bus!"), and had probably never been a young boy (too many incidents to pick one out). I mean...for fuck's sake, man. No character in this comic book acts anything like a real human being. And I guess that sounds silly in a way...but in my mind, the more fantastic the story, the more necessary it is to ground it in the real world. I wish Frank had read Maximortal before he sat down to write this piece of shit. (Speaking of, is Rick Veitch getting any credit or money from Brightburn? Cuz some lawsuits are worth pursuing, y'know?)

ANYway...save your money. Unless this thing shoots up 3,000% in value or something like that...in which case...shit, you really should have rolled the dice on this one. Sorry about that, chief.