Sounds like a washing machine, doesn't it? Well, have another listen.
Sounds like Victory, doesn't it? Mmm-hmm. That's what I'm talking about. But let us go back . . . back to The Beginning.
Some time ago . . . ah, why bullshit you? It was on the 6th of April, 2014. What is the 21st Century for if not timestamps, after all? ANYway . . . being short of funds and moderately long on bills, when my washing machine stopped working I did not follow my first impulse and go to buy a new one. Nor did I follow my second impulse and call a repairman. I knew that even that would have been a strain on my early-retired-teacher-and-two-special-needs-adult-children-living-with-me budget. So with malice toward all and charity for none, I went online and found out how to fix it. If you want the whole story, you can go back through the archives and find it if you like the thrill of the chase . . . or you can just click HERE.
I actually thought that that would be that and I wouldn't have to worry about my washing machine ever again. Of course, back in those days I was way way overweight and a heavy smoker, so I didn't think I had more than a couple of years left to me. (My Health Insurance Questionnaire told me I had a physical age of 69 at the time . . . and I was only 56 then. And I had kind of kept the whole smoking a pack and a half a day thing to myself. So that might've added another 5, 10, ? years to that "age" . . . . )
But a little while ago I noticed that the washing machine was starting to get a little cranky about heading into the spin cycle. So I did what any red-blooded American boy would do: I ignored it. And then it just plain stopped going into the spin cycle at all. So I did a little jury-rigging: I put a broken piece of pencil into the lid latch hole. It worked. But much as I wanted to pretend that all would be well and all would be well and all would be exceedingly well, the writing was obviously on the wall. So I ordered a new Lid Switch Assembly. $13 this time around. But I didn't want to put it in, didn't want to go through all of that disassembly and reassembly business again. Until earlier tonight when I put in a load of wash, and when I came back to check on it, this is the sight that greeted my weary eyes:
See the not agitating agitator? See the dirty water? Lots of dirty water? Yep. It was a dead stop situation.
I was sorry that I hadn't been doing any drinking, because then I could have said, "Ah, fuck it," and gone upstairs and not thought about it until the light of day. Instead I went upstairs and started looking for Whirlpool Part Number 3949237: Switch, Lid. And amazingly enough, I found it within a minute or two. Alas, I hadn't had the foresight to take note of the web address of the video I had watched the first time around, so I had to start from scratch for the guidance. Along the way I found a video that talked about how to bypass the lid switch, and I was sorely tempted to do that . . . but decided that hey, I already had the switch and I had done this before, so why not just do the right thing, Spike.
And I found this video:
I don't know if this guy did a better job of explaining the process or if my muscle memory of the first job (I certainly had no information in my head about it) had lingered, but it seemed like it took no time at all to get the washing machine apart, take out the old switch . . .
. . . and put in the new one. And once I had it all back together I baited my breath, plugged in the machine, and turned the dial to the spin line . . . and it began to spin.
Spinning at last! Spinning at last! Lord God Almighty, it was spinning at last!
When it stopped spinning and I opened the lid, the water was all gone. I put the load of now clean clothes into the dryer and started the washer up again for a second load with a feeling that wasn't too awfully distant from confidence.
Can I have some drinks now?
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