"New" David Bowie

 I found something called Lou Reed - The Ultimate Music Guide FROM THE MAKERS OF UNCUT on the Louisville Free Public Library website (eMagazine & Comics sector), so of course I had to have a look at that. And while reading about "Venus in Furs" I was puzzled by David Cavanagh's reference to "a dominatrix whipping the skin off a submissive wretch." I've listened to "Venus in Furs" quite a few times, and I never got the impression that it was quite that visceral. So I went to have a look at the lyrics. And found that Mr. Cavanagh had been a bit generous in his comments: there's nothing even close to his summation of what happens in this song. But on the search page that I used to get to the lyrics, there was also a link to a Wikipedia page on the song, so I gave that a click just for the hell of it. And it was a short entry, so I read it...and was astonished at the penultimate line of text in this entry: "Additionally, the early David Bowie composition 'Little Toy Soldier,' recorded with his band The Riot Squad in 1967, lifts its chorus almost verbatim from 'Venus in Furs.'" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venus_in_Furs_(song)) Not because it said that Bowie had lifted a piece of the song for one of his own...but because (1) I had never heard of the song "Little Toy Soldier" and (2) I had never heard of the band The Riot Squad...and I've spent a fair portion of the past 46 years running down every Bowie alley I could find.

Fortunately this is the 21st century, so it took no effort at all not only to track down information on this group, but also to hear four of their songs, all featuring David Bowie on lead vocals.

"Toy Soldier" is a Bowie original...presumably "inspired" by The Velvet Underground's "Venus in Furs." It's a dreadful song about a little toy soldier who whips a naked little girl "every night." There's maniacal laughing in the background throughout...and at the end of the song (yes, this is a spoiler) the toy soldier's spring breaks and he beats the little girl to death. So yes, it does out Velvet Underground The Velvet Underground...but that is not a good thing here. It's just vulgar and stupid and ugly. This is a song I wish I could unhear and I suggest that you avoid it if you love David Bowie, even if your heart aches for "completion."

"Silly Boy Blue" is another Bowie original...and yes, it is an early (and demo) version of the song which later appeared on David Bowie (Deram, 1967)...and which I also have on my VINYL copy of Images 1966–1967. This version is very rough...with out of tune guitar and vocals that can best be described as faltering...but you can see an earnest 19 year-old David Jones in it, so I think it's worth doing. You can give it a listen at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2UoEExpZpk

"I'm Waiting for the Man" is the Lou Reed song (which first appeared on  The Velvet Underground & Nico (1967). The vocal is pretty hilarious, actually. Bowie is trying to hit that Lou Reed zone, but it comes in more like Bob Dylan...which just makes it ludicrous. There's even a harmonica line, for fuck's sake. Also, Bowie messes up the lyrics several times...and adds an inexplicable "to walk me home" after the final "I'm waiting for my man." Um...what? It makes you wonder if he understood this song at all...or if he just had a really bad sense of humor back in the day. At any rate, it's probably worth a listen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeLBR8-LwSw.

"Silver Treetop School For Boys" is the final song on this ep. It's another Bowie original...and a truly terrible song, but at least it's not a wretched and mean-spirited song like "Toy Soldier." It's hard to believe that Bowie wrote this thing. What may be even harder to believe is that there are at least two cover versions of this song. At any rate...it purports to be a slice of early life thing, and bears some resemblance to early Bowie stuff like "When I'm Five" with a side order of Pink Floyd Lite. You can hear Bowie's version of it (which was not released) at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ng_PVsJ0t00.

I also found an interesting online article entitled "The Riot Squad - Jump ! + The Toy Soldier EP" which was just published a minute ago (Monday, May 03, 2021) and has some good information: https://allmusic-wingsofdream.blogspot.com/2015/02/the-riot-squad-jump-toy-soldier-ep_71.html.

ADDENDUM: I found two other kind of interesting things in the course of putting this stuff together. 

Thing One: There are several cover versions of "I'm Waiting for the Man" by Cheap Trick...and they are surprisingly good. ("Surprisingly" because....well, sorry, Cheap Trick, but you're just not my 🍵.)

Thing Two: Another Bowie song I'd never heard of before popped up: "How Lucky You Are (Miss Peculiar)." It's one of those kind of cabaret-ish things which I find pretty irksome, but it doesn't cost anything to listen to it, so have a go: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-KDzORnlCUw.